Not Another Plot Line
by MissDomaYuset
Summary: A funny twist on fanfiction, staring our very own Seto Kaiba and Mokuba Kaiba! R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**I hope you enjoy this little one shot.**

**I may make another chapter if you enjoyed it.**

**Anyhow, let the story begin. **

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Yugioh!**

It was another peaceful day at the Kaiba mansion. Kaiba was busily typing away at some document when the doorbell sounded. Sighing, he gets up and answers it.

"What do you want?" Kaiba asked coldly, opening the door to some girl. She looked really pretty.

"I am here to bare your children!"

Kaiba frowned and slammed the door in her face.

The doorbell sounded off again. Kaiba opened it, thinking it was the girl again and was ready to call the hounds on her when he saw it wasn't her.

Yugi was standing at the doorway. "Kaiba!" He said. "Someone poisoned me with a bottle of OOC-ness!"

Kaiba smirked. "Will it kill you?"

"Worse!" He wailed. "It's going to make me emo about Atemu being gone and you will have to date me so I don't kill myself!"

Kaiba slammed the door again. The doorbell rings again.

"I am not answering that." He growled to himself. But the bell kept ringing and ringing and ringing…

Kaiba tore the door open. "WHAT?!"

Mokuba sniffled. "I forgot my key! You didn't have to yell at me!"

Kaiba sighed and let his brother in the house. Then the phone rang.

Kaiba picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Seven days…" Said the voice.

"Excuse me?"

"In seven days, you will die. Unless you get married to…" Kaiba hung up the phone.

The phone rang again. Kaiba ignored it.

"Aren't you going to answer that?" Mokuba asked.

"No." He said simply.

Mokuba picked up the phone before his brother could protest. "Hello?"

A happy smile came across his face as he looked at his older brother. "It's Noah!" Then the smile faded into confusion. "Um, what's incest?"

Kaiba hung up the phone and threw it out the window.

The doorbell rung again, making Kaiba's eyes twitch a little. Mokuba made a move to answer it.

Kaiba blocked him. "Stay away from the door." He commanded.

Mokuba pouted. "But I am expecting someone!" He pushed past his older brother and opened the door.

It was Rebecca. "Hey there cutie!"

Kaiba seemed somewhat relived it was a little girl. Kaiba was about to leave the room thinking it was one of those childhoods' crushes when…

"Are you ready to run away from our caretakers in a attempt to find ourselves and maybe even get married?" Rebecca asked cheerfully.

Near his snapping point, Kaiba promptly picked up Mokuba, slammed the door again, and walked into the kitchen.

"What are we doing Nii-Sama?" Mokuba asked.

Kaiba pulled out a sheet of paper. "We are going to kill every Fan fiction author on this list."


	2. Chapter 2

**You asked for it, and I shall dish it out!**

…

**Normally I would just say "-And here it is!" but I have been having the urge to say "Dish it out" all day.**

**Whatever,**

**Enjoy the story!**

**DISCLAIMER: Me no own Yu-Gi-Oh! You no sue Do-Ma-Oh!**

Mokuba made a grab for the paper. "No Seto! Killing is bad!"

Kaiba crossed his arms. "Oh please, the worst I might do is give them is a lifetime of pain and woe and fill their body with unbearable agony."

"…On second thought, just go with the killing."

Suddenly the fridge door swung open, and a girl jumped out. "Hello Kaiba! I am from another universe and you need my help to save this world! LET'S GET MARRIED!" 

Kaiba blinked and threw a rock at her head, thus knocking her out.

Then the freezer swung open and a guy jumped out. "YO DUDE! I am here to totally save the day and make love to…"

The poor guy didn't get to finish his intro. Kaiba had thrown a frying pan at his head.

"SETO!" Mokuba cried.

Kaiba crossed his arms. "What? I had every right. …And I was a little afraid to let that freak to finish his sentence."

Kaiba took Mokuba outside to escape the madness that was invading his home. They soon found their way to the park.

Rex Raptor ran past. "Noooo! I don't wanna!" He wailed.

Weevil ran after with a ladybug suit. "But you must be my love!"

The Kaiba brothers blinked, and deiced not ask.

They kept walking when they came across Atemu.

Mokuba had a big happy grin. "Atemu! I thought you were dead!"

"I was!" He cheered.

Kaiba raised an eyebrow. "I thought you went to the afterlife. Let me talk to Yugi."

Atemu looked confused. "But he isn't here."

"You share the same body."

Atemu blinked. "Well, now I have my own."

Kaiba twitched. "What in Ra's name is going on?!"

Atemu smiled. "It's impossible for me to have a relationship with anyone without a body of my own! That's why Bakura and I got bodies of our own!"

Kaiba smacked his forehead. "You mean to say you left the afterlife, where you belong, just to start DATE!?"

"And Bakura!" Atemu reminded.

"But you hate him!" Mokuba cried out.

Atemu winked. "Nonsense! I am going out with him tonight!"

"And Anzu?!" Mokuba asked.

"We are going out at noon!"

Kaiba and Mokuba listened in horror as Atemu listed all his dates for the week. Kaiba, unable to take it anymore, picked up Mokuba and hightailed out of there.

"I take it back!" Mokuba yelled. "Fan fiction sucks!"

Suddenly, the brothers were surrounded by a tough looking group whom vaguely resembled the Italian mafia.

"Kaiba brothers…" Said one of the shady looking men. "You must come with us."

His voice was dripping with a thick accent. Kaiba let out a frustrated sigh. "I _really_ don't want to know."

"You must come with us so we can bite you. We vant to drink your vlood!"

"You have to be friggin kidding me!"

Mokuba raised an eyebrow. "So you guys are vampires?"

The men in suits nodded.

"But its daylight. You should be a pile of dust."

The vampire laughed EVILY! "Silly child! This is fan fiction! Anything can happen!"

Kaiba growled. "Are you saying anything illogical is logical in this world!?"

"If the fan girl or boy wishes it to be so, then yes!"

Mokuba giggled. "If that's so, I want an army of fire breathing hamsters to come in and eat you guys!"

And so and fire breathing army of hamsters ran into the scene and ate everyone.

Kaiba stood there dumbfounded. "Just what the hell is going on here?"

Suddenly, a rather large gorilla ran past Kaiba and snatched Mokuba.

"Hey! Give back my brother!" Kaiba yelled, running after the ape.

"SNAP! I am getting kidnapped big brother!" Mokuba yelled. "…AGAIN!"


	3. Chapter 3

**I know! I know! It has been a LONG while since I updated.**

**I am forcing myself to write Yugioh again. I need to complete these stories…**

**Don't know what else to say…**

**DISCLAIMER: I own none of them!**

"I can't believe it! This is friggin insane!" Kaiba yelled as he ran after Mokubas' kidnapper; a kidnapper who was a hairy gorilla.

Kaiba was only inches away from touching the apes' fur when the animal flew. Yes, that's right. The ape leapt into the air and started to fly, like a retarded superman.

Kaiba grabbed his head out of disbelief. "This is not happening!"

"What are you yelling about Rich boy?" Wheeler asked, walking out from behind a tree.

Kaiba shot a glare. "Nothing! Go away mutt!" The last thing he needed now was some rookie duelist challenging him to a game.

Wheeler laughed. "Whatever, hey, you want to catch a movie sometime?"

Kaiba stared at Joey for the longest time. That was not what he was expecting. "Are you on drugs?" He asked.

"Um, no…"

"Then you are insane."

"Crazy in love!" Joey screamed in a girlish manner.

Kaiba sorely wished he had a gun to shot himself with.

Wheeler looked at his nails casually. "It is time we stop fighting it. I like you. And you like me."

"NO! No I don't! You ARE on drugs!" Kaiba looked around for a baseball bat, a rock, chainsaw, ANYTHING.

Wheeler sniffed. "Come on man! Don't you feel sorry for me? My old man abused me in stuff!"

"But that is not my problem! I couldn't care less!"

"Don't make me go Emo!"

Kaiba winced at the memory of Yugi. "Emo's, why is it always the Emo's?"

"You love me!" Wheeler yelled, just as a group of nuns walked by. Kaiba wished he was dead.

"No. No I don't! Go away!" Kaiba yelled in rage. "And what about Mai?"

Joey shrugged. "Ah, she is kinda going out with my sister."

Kaiba was in stunned silence.

"Then Mai is going out with Yugi, then Honda, then Duke, then…"

"STOP!" Kaiba quickly interrupted. "Is everyone going out with everyone?!"

Joey nodded cheerfully. "Yep!"

"_Why_?"

"Because it is fun!"

Kaiba has never looked so confused in his life. "What?"

Suddenly Joeys watch went off. "Oh look at that. Excuse me; I have a date with…"

Kaiba ran off, looking VERY stressed. "This isn't happening, this isn't…"

Suddenly a woman who looked EXACTLY like Kaiba with long hair blocked his path. "Stop right there! I am your long lost twin!"

Kaiba buried his face in his hands. "Someone kill me…"

"That can be arranged."

Kaiba spun around to see none other then the mighty Grosaboro himself.

"What the hell?!" Kaiba felt like his head was going to explode with confusion. 

"Yes my boy! I am back from the dead!" Grosaboro laughed like a madman.

"But I killed you twice!" Kaiba yelled, nearly scream

Grosaboro laughed louder.

Kaiba became speechless. Hoping for a cheesy monolog of some sort to help fill in some of the answers, he waited for his step father to stop laughing.

Grosaboro keeps laughing. He laughs so hard, his face goes red.

"Not that I care, but you really should…"

Grosaboros' head explodes.

"…Stop." Kaiba coughed and looked around. "That was… interesting."

Then, Kaiba's twin points her finger in the air. "Father has been murdered! I must avenge him!"

Kaiba stared at her oddly. "That's nice. I have to save my brother now."

His 'twin' blinks in confusion. "You brother? Oh, sorry. He was taken. You can't get him back."

"The hell I won't!" Kaiba snapped.

The girl crossed her arms. "Well fine! Just go to the authors homes and kill them. Once you do, order will be restored."

Kaiba would of hugged her, if she wasn't so creepy looking. I mean really; a female version of himself?

But right now, he needed to be on his way. He is coming to YOUR home tonight.


	4. Chapter 4

After breaking down the forth wall, and beating up a whole army of Mudkips, Seto Kaiba finally made it the real world

After breaking down the forth wall, and beating up a whole army of Mudkips, Seto Kaiba finally made it the real world. His first target was a small apartment, which was tucked into a corner. It seemed plain and abandoned in comparison of the units surrounding it with its chipped pain and lack of flowerpots. But Kaiba knew this had to be the home of one of the authors.

It was an anime thing.

Using his amazing skills of climbing up the fire escape and breaking into the window, he soon found himself in a pigsty. Raman cups and anime DVD covers scattered the floor as well as some questionable fan-made manga.

The only source of light came from the other side of the room, a rather large and expensive computer. And a rather chubby, middle-aged woman sat in front of it. Her hair was stringy and stuck up in the strangest directions. Her shirt was a size too large and was covered with dragons and wolves.

"Are you Pr3ttyKi77y?" Kaiba asked a little louder then necessary.

The woman spun around, shocked. And she literally threw herself at his feet. "Oh my god! Seto Kaiba is in my house! YES!"

Kaiba quickly kicked her off himself and took a step back. "Are you the one causing the chaos in my world?"

The woman shook her head. "I simply write stories my dear. I haven't taken a step out of this apartment unless it was to buy food or for a Anime Convention."

"Um… And for your job?"

The woman laughed. "I sell anime smut for that! Oh, and people just love to buy the issues with you as the main character. You with that Yugi muffin!"

Horrified, Kaiba proceeded to pull out a machine gun out of nowhere and shot the lady a couple hundred times. Then he dropped a grenade and jumped out the window dramatically. The entire left side of the building exploded.

"Well…" Kaiba stood up and brushed himself off. He took out the list and crossed out the first name. "One down… and that many to go. Damn."

Onwards to the next sterotype!


End file.
